As I stated in my original post I work for Corporate America, with its huge infrastructure, massive middle management staffing, ridiculously paid higher management with degrees and the pomposity of Roman Emperors. I assume you get the picture.. Now to get employment within this highly structured enviroment one must go thru the equivalent of some form of 3rd world torture.. interviews upon interviews, psychological testing, intelligence testing, computer skils, presentations,more interviews. They act like we are being employed at the CIA. With all that in mind one wonders how in the world Bob Feldman got this job.
Bob is an extremely odd individual, sloppily dressed wearing dockers meant for a man half his size and shirts from 10 years ago. At lunch Bob ventured out for his exercise wearing spandex and cool max shirts, again too small for his burgeoning frame. He's the office ladies man, cool around the girls acting like Tony the adventurous stud from Seinfeld fame. But to the rest of us Bob is a character to be made fun off and laughed at.. These following paragraphs are our life with Bob Feldman.
He has his flaws, hygiene, love of the ladies those things like any other man. But Bob took those flaws to extremes. he was mid 30's who thought he was 18. He loved the dope, loved the beer, loved being the cool guy except that he was a complete an utter moron.
Mr Feldman went back for his college fraternity reunion weekend. Partying with the young college fraternity brothers and of course the lucious coeds... Drunk, stoned and egged on, the 35 year old corporate sales rep proceeded to climb on the fraternity roof and jump. Bob wanted the undying adulation of his younger brothers and of course the coeds.. He jumped, flying thru the air and landing in the yard and of course breaking his ankle.. Bob is a complete moron.
He would steal off at lunch daily to smoke dope behind the office building. In his car he lit up, got stoned and went back to work. The daily routine went on and on until the day the Mr Feldman forgot to put his car in gear. He finished went back to work and his car went careening down the hill across the parking lot and smashed into another car..Bob is a complete moron..
Speaking of smoking dope- Mr Feldman continued his lunch time vagrancies, venturing further and further away from the office building on lunchtime dope walks. One day Mr F comes back from his adventure completely covered in mud tracking dirt right to his office. What happened asked a curious onlooker. I got lost state Bob, I got lost..another time he showed up after lunch with a knot on his head and dirt on his too tight pants.. Again what happened? in a low gutteral tone Bob proceeded to explain that he was smoking and talking on the phone and wham hit his head on a pipe outside the building knocking himself out cold.......Mr F is a moron.
stay tuned for more adventures in our next installment-- Can Bob jump garbage cans in a single bound???
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